UFC 61: What The Fuck (Spoilers)

That’s really what it should have been called: UFC 61: What the Fuck or maybe WTF 61. God fucking dammit. I feel like how I usually feel after going to a strip club—completely unfulfilled. My MMA balls are now a turqoisey hue.

After watching TUF diligently and seeing Ken Shamrock and Tito Ortiz bark at each other for a whole season, their climactic collision ended up being rather… indecisive. At about 1:15 in the first round, Tito delivered about 5 or 6 unanswered elbows to Ken’s face from Ken’s guard, resulting in a referee stoppage.

As soon as Herb Dean pushed Tito off, however, Ken sprung up and began questioning the call. WTF!!! What we really needed for Ken to quit his yappin was for Tito to knock him the hell out or submit him. Decisive. Done. But no. Now we have to endure more of Tito’s melonface taking more verbal jabs at Shamrock and Shamrock flying off the handle… etc etc until the next time they fight. So I can pay more money to see how this shitty drama unfolds.

The other fight that I was really looking forward to was Arlovski vs. Sylvia. I was giddy like a little girl when they faced off, and sad like a little Romanian orphan after the result… The hulking retard won by decision… Geezus criminy. I have never seen fighting look as ugly as it does coming out of Tim Sylvia. Ignore the fact that every time he moves, his midsection jiggles to catch up. Everything about his game looks horrible. I have much respect for those judges, because I could barely watch that fight.

Arlovski did basically the same thing for 5 rounds. Jab.. jab…. jab-overhand!!! Jab….. jab……. jab-overhand!!! This pattern was interspersed with getting punched in the jaw. Not too hard to figure that one out. Meanwhile, Sylvia closes his eyes and swings wildly in each encounter. He did connect more than Arlovski, and won the fight accordingly, but I still don’t believe he is the superior fighter.

Fuckdammit.

Good news is that Dana White announced tonight that Wanderlei Silva is coming to the UFC. Holy crap that’s going to kick so much ass. If Chuck beats Babalu in UFC 62, he will face Wandy… and I think the money for that ticket might as well be in Dana’s pocket right now.